I'm feeling so much better!

Hey bloggies!
I can't tell you what a difference a day makes! I'm so sorry for the embarrassing display of self-pity I shared yesterday. In the words of my friend, Rachel, however, transparency is beautiful. I considered feeling terrible about what I posted yesterday until I realized it's the stuff of life, and I'm sure there are moms (and dads) feeling much the same. Sometimes knowing someone is feeling as overwhelmed as you can make it easier to bear.

I've shared in recent posts about all of the trying times the people around me have been going through. I have a couple of friends re-visiting cancer, a friend still in a coma from an aneurysm, a friend's husband recovering from heart surgery (he had it this past Wednesday and PTL, is recovering quickly), a young girl recovering from heart problems and Steven Curtis Chapman's devastating news. During my Bible study homework this week, we were asked to list the people who we have had the privilege to intercede for in prayer recently. Looking back at the Greek word for intercede, you can clearly see the root word "agonize". I can honestly say that for the people listed above, I have truly agonized in prayer recently.

These people, as important as they are, are not who this post is about.

It's about people like me. People like the moms who have healthy, wonderful children and wonderful husbands, but who still need prayer to make it through their days. Yesterday as I sat in my Women's Bible study and listened to the prayer requests listed above, I felt silly asking for prayer about my long days while Mark was at work, so I didn't. Looking back on how rough the rest of the day was, I clearly could have used it. I guess what I'm saying is that there is enough of God to go around. He doesn't need us to pick and choose what we bring to Him in prayer. He is big enough and powerful enough to meet every single need we could bring Him. He doesn't need us to be gatekeepers, deciding what is and is not worthy of His attention. It all is. Even better...He wants it to be.

So please....those of you reading this blog. Do not ever look at the prayer requests of those around you and consider your needs too insignificant for the Lord's time. Let's stop making God smaller. He's bigger than we could imagine. When you need Him, ask for Him. He can't wait to help you.

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I wonder if there are child labor laws against this....

Our friends' daughter, Lizzie, recently came over to play while her mommy went on a field trip with her big brother's preschool. While she and the boys were playing, I took a few minutes to fold a basket of towels and washclothes. Lizzie came over to see what I was doing and I asked her if she'd like to help. She was very enthusiastic about helping me fold the laundry. So much so, in fact, that my boys had to come over and get in the game. When they were done, I had a pile of balled up washcloths to refold, but it was so cute watching them.

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Hitting the Wall

In my life before kids, I was a dental assistant. As many of you already know from the frustration of trying to schedule appointments, dentists (in general) don't work 5 days a week. There are some in group practices who have all 5 days covered between the docs, but overall, dentists work 3-4 days a week. That means that the first few years of my married life, I only worked 3-4 days a week. In fact, for a big part of it, I worked Monday-Wednesday, 6:30-4:30. (As I look back at that schedule, I honestly don't know what I did with all my time. I was rolling in time.) Every so often, due to various reasons, we would have to work a Thursday. And I would mention it as a prayer request at my Tuesday night small group. Seriously. You can imagine the kind of eye-rolling that received. All of my 9-5, M-F friends would make sure and let me know just how sorry for me they were. Thinking about it now, I deserved a good smack. Good thing I have nice friends.

Anyway....
The point was, though, that anything can be tough if it's outside of your "norm". If you're not used to it, it can be rough. If you look back on those hours I listed, I had to be AT work by 6:30. Most of my 9-5 friends were probably rolling out of bed sometime after that. But I was used to it. They weren't. If they had requested I pray for them when they had an early morning meeting requiring them to be up by, say, 6:00, I could have rolled my eyes at them. You get my point. It's all about what you're used to.

I'm used to my husband working late. It's par for the course at his job. They have a system where everyone is required to stay late one night a week, and Mark's night is Wednesday. This usually gets him home around 10:00. I'm even used to him working more than one late night in a row. It happens. I don't like it, but it happens. What I'm not used to is him working until 11:00 for 3 days in a row. My kids haven't seen their father since Monday and I have seen him only to say "Oh, good, you're home....I can go to bed now." My kids are working my last nerve and I am working theirs.

I think about all the women (and men) whose husbands (or wives) are serving our country overseas, causing them to be gone for months on end, and I feel silly complaining. I think about them women (and men) whose spouses have passed away, meaning they will never come home, and I feel horrible for complaining. But it's all about what you're used to. I'm not used to this. So I've hit a wall. My sink is full of dishes and the toys are all over the floor. There's laundry in the basket that should have been folded yesterday. My kids just had string cheese and hot dogs for dinner because it required no effort, and now they are watching "Blue's Clues" while I throw myself a pity party on this blog.

I've said this before and I'll say it again. My life is good. I know my life is good, but just because it's good doesn't mean it's always easy.

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Can Wii Play?

I am in love.

This Monday, during our rainy Memorial Day BBQ, I had my first encounter with the Wii. I know I am way behind the times, and many of you are saying "Where've you been?!" (and others of you are saying "What's a Wii?), but this was my first opportunity to play. And play and play some more.

I've always been a Nintendo fan. It started during spring break when I was about 13 years old. My parents got my brother and I the original Nintendo with Super Mario Bros. and Duck Hunt. I'm pretty sure that we did not shower the entire week. We sat on the couch and played until our weary eyes forced themselves shut for a brief sleep, only to be reopened again for more gaming. Since then I have always had the latest Nintendo. Super Nintendo. Nintendo 64. GameCube. I particularly love the Nintendo because it has the most family friendly selection of games. I don't like "shoot-em-up" games. I like "cute" games. But I stopped short of the Wii. For several reasons. I was against it on principle. I don't play video games to get exercise. Even if I wasn't against it, I couldn't afford one, anyway. And even if I could afford one, I couldn't find one. So I was Wii-less.

Until Monday. Now I am a woman obsessed. I must have a Wii. For those of you who don't know, the Wii is the first video game system that requires you to use your whole body to participate. In a tennis game I played against my brother, we were swinging our arms and running all over the living room to hit the "ball". The same was true while bowling and boxing. Oh, my word, the boxing! I have never had so much fun getting a workout. And workout, I did. I woke up yesterday morning too sore to type this post. It felt great.

I spent quite a bit of time yesterday searching for a store with a Wii on the shelves. There are none. So I started bidding on eBay. And lost. God has graciously reminded me that if I want a Wii, I need to save up for one (if I had found one yesterday, it would have gone on a credit card), so starting today, I have begun Mission:Wii Save. Which begins with my selling everything in my apartment on eBay that's not nailed down. Mark told me that was fine as long as we still have a car when he comes home from work. I say, who needs a car when you can have a Wii?

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A Post Full of Nothing

I'm having writer's block. I don't have any pictures to post because my dad got a new camera before our vacation, so he was the designated photographer. I am now at his mercy as I wait for a disc or email full of pictures (hint, hint, dad). I will post some as soon as I have them.

Vacations are wonderful, and I'm so glad I had the opportunity to have one. There was a part of vacation that I had forgotten about, however. The mourning period when it's over and life is supposed to just go back to normal. In our case it's a little worse than normal. Mark is having to pay the piper at work for taking a week off. He got home about 10:30 last night and today will be the same. It makes for long days with the kids, but it's a small price to pay for the fun we had last week.

So I'm thrilled with the memories but sad that they are over. I'm rested from the trip but tired from the long days since we've been back. Forgive me that I have nothing much else to write at the moment. I just didn't want to ignore the blog like I once would have done. Hopefully I'll be back soon with something interesting to say.

Enjoy Memorial Day weekend, everyone!

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Vay-Kay

On Mark's and my first anniversary, we went for a long weekend to Victoria, British Columbia (if you've never been, you should try and go...especially if you live on the West Coast. It's gorgeous). Shortly after returning home, we found out we were pregnant with our first child. A child that we would miscarry, 13 weeks later. That same week, Mark lost his job.

Six months later, we found out we were pregnant again, and 9 months later, Mark had to use all the vacation time he had accrued at his (fairly) new job to take paternity leave. Eighteen months later, he had to use all of his vacation time to take paternity leave again when Micah was born. Since then we have been too busy trying to stretch one income to cover four people to take a vacation (unless you include the short camping trip we took last summer, which was fun, but not a "vacation", if you know what I mean).

Until this last weekend, which is why you haven't heard from me in awhile. We've been on vacation!!! Some friends of ours own a house in Central Oregon (specifically Sunriver), so we rented it for several days of sun, fun, biking, eating, playing and shopping. The kids had a blast and so did we. My parents were with us, which made it wonderful for Mark and I. It made the adult-to-child ratio 4-2. We were no longer the only people responsible for holding hands or taking toddlers to the potty. It was heavenly.

We took the kids to the High Desert Museum , which they were crazy about. They especially went nuts over Thomas the Otter, and there may or may not have been some stuffed otters and an otter book purchased at the gift shop on the way out. We biked with the kids in the trailer behind Mark (those of you who know me personally are laughing hysterically at the thought of me on a bike, and yes...it was just about that funny...or horrifying....one of the two...but I did it). We ate our way through the weekend, which means my Weight Watchers weigh-in was terrible this morning, but that's to be expected. The evenings after the kids went to bed were spent in a Men vs. Women Mario Party Nintendo tournament that turned the men into boys. Sorry, guys. Better luck next time!

Over all it was relaxing and fun. It was good for the soul. I'm so thankful God blessed us with this opportunity. He knew this weary mom needed it. I'm sure my husband did, too. I'll post pictures soon.

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Happy Day-After Mother's Day

I have great friends. The Lord has blessed me beyond measure and beyond what I deserve. They are kind, generous, funny, and best of all iron. To sharpen my iron. They are great.

But my best friend is my Mom. She is loving. She is forgiving. She is patient. She knows the worst of me. She believes the best of me. She is funny, but not as funny as my brother and I are, which drives her crazy. She is an amazing grandmother (mama) and babysitter (thank you). She is my encourager, my accountability partner, my sister in Christ and my mom. I love her. Thank you, mom!

You know what's amazing? I have a "bonus Mom". My Aunt Maureen, who I have blogged about before, does not have children of her own, so my brother and I have become like children to her. And now my children are like grandchildren to her. How fortunate can you be? I don't have words to tell you how blessed I am to have my mom and my aunt. My Aunt is generous, loving and available any time I need her. She is kind, loving and the definition of self-less. She's terrific. I love her. Thank you, Aunt Maureen!

I have so many lovely women in my life. My Mom and my Aunt Maureen are the closest, but my Aunt Bonnie is a godly woman who I've been inspired by long-distance, and my Grandmother is a spunky, funny, woman who loves Jesus even though He is allowing her to go through cancer. I am surrounded by a cloud of women who make is possible for me to do what I do. I talk about Jesus boldly, because I know I am loved (in great part by these women) even though I look like a "Jesus Freak".

Happy Mother's Day to all of you! You are amazing! I pray that someday someone feels about me that way that I do about you.

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Hope

In the last week, a family friend has been hospitalized with an aneurysm and is in a coma as I type this. Two dear friends from church have found out that the cancers they have been battling are back with a vengeance, and the (only 31 year-old) husband of a sweet friend is facing open heart surgery this summer. I won't lie. It's been a lot to take in. While none of these are happening in my immediate family, they are all people who are in my immediate sphere of life. These are the kinds of crises that we generally experience sporadically in life. For all of these things to happen in one week has brought me to my knees, metaphorically and literally.

God is good, All the time. All the time, God is good. Do I believe this? Do those facing these challenges believe this, or is it something we say?

I recently was witness to a true, honest to goodness miracle. The old-fashioned kind. The kind that can not be explained by anyone or anything other than supernatural power. A very young girl at our church faced a health crisis, and the doctors gave her little-to-no chance of survival. At the very least they were certain she would need a new heart. You can read the story here. That little girl is alive and well. I see her running around at church every Sunday. Nothing the doctors did "fixed" her. They simply kept her alive while God healed her. Period. He healed her.

So what about my friends facing health challenges now? Is God only good if He works the same kind of miracle for them that He did for Alisa? And what if He hadn't healed Alisa? Would that mean He wasn't good?

In all honesty, I don't struggle with the answer to that question. I get His sovereignty. I struggle with a lot of things in my walk with the Lord, but I understand that His perspective is eternal and ours is temporal. I get it.

My struggle is for those who don't get it. Those who have no hope. As I pray for these friends of mine going through the drama of life, I wonder how people do it who don't have hope. Not hope for healing. God is certainly still in the miracle business and is capable of healing, but that's not what we hope in. We have hope in the fact that this world is not all there is. If God decides to allow my friends to succumb to the sicknesses plaguing them, we can rest in the fact that we will see them again some day. We can celebrate that they are getting to see Jesus face-to-face, which, quite frankly, makes me a little jealous. We have hope.

So how do we share that hope? How do we make sure that those whose bodies are failing them can know that they can have a better, perfect body for all of eternity? How can we make sure that those who have been failed by our superficial, limited version of love know that they can experience perfect love for all eternity? How can we make sure that those who are looking for a God who moves mountains knows that the greatest miracles He performs are the ones where He transforms our hearts?

I think the best answer to that question is to make sure that we actually believe those things ourselves, not just say we do. The hope we have available to us is so vital, we need to make sure that we are resting in it ourselves. So much so that it becomes contagious. Because in a world that is suffering, physically and emotionally, nothing is more contagious than hope.

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A Sign of Things to Come?

Elijah loves Little Einsteins. For quite awhile now it's been his favorite show. He's had flirtations here and there with other programs, but he always seems to come back to the Einsteins. From various birthdays and holidays, he is decked out with Einsteins pajamas, t-shirts, toys, books, puzzles and even lawn chairs. He is a super-fan.

This morning there was a new episode of Little Einsteins on that they had been advertising all week. I always get a bit excited by a new episode because I have seen them all (or heard them while I was cleaning the kitchen or folding laundry) a zillion times (I'm rounding up). Earlier this week, when I saw the new episode advertised, I immediately set the DVR. The timing for this new episode was perfect, because we are having a house full of people over tonight, so those Einsteins and their Rocket were going to buy me 22 minutes of house cleaning (probably repeatedly throughout the day).

During our morning routine, while changing them from pajamas to play clothes, I announced the exciting news. "There's a new episode of the Einsteins on today! Hooray! Do you guys want to watch it after breakfast?"

And this is what I hear out of Elijah:

"Nah. Little Einsteins aren't cool."

Excuse me? There were so many things wrong with that statement, I didn't know where to begin. Since when did Elijah have opinions about anything being "cool"? He's three! And certainly if anything in his three-year-old world was considered "cool", it would be the Einsteins, right?! Right?!

Suddenly I was a hopelessly un-hip mother of a teenager. In a three-year-old's body. I think I just got a taste of what's to come.

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